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Saturday, March 21, 2009

kudos to d lord...

dis(acc. to me) is a disclaimer - fr those who cant appreciate satire or humour in its raunchy form kindly dnt read fr u might jst constipate on d hogwash dat'll follow dis...













college fests r an unholy matrimony heaven n hell, whr d beauty of heavens descend down upon us in deir mortal form n d beasts of hell cut loose to gawk(i hope u gt my drift...;-)...girls r beautiful no doubt n some girls r more so, which acc to me is d severest means of discrimination by nature...no wt m saying is by no means chauvnistic n hear me out b4 u call me a "^$%*#%*&!"...nw acc to charles dickens(fr dose who dnt know him he ws a prick n fr dose who do know him, i think he ws a prick;-) so dis white-beard nerd proposed dat nature always works out everything acc to d best possible option available n d fittest shit on d planet survives...



nw superman might hv bin frm krypton bt i doubt whether d man of steel ddnt go thru puberty n hd freckles or ddnt gt tongue-tied talkin to louis lane...nw he wanted to live as "clark kent" is a diff matter altogthr, mayb he wntd to pursue celibacy fr all i know bt wt m sayin is dat mayb, jst mayb if dicken's theory ws true, nature wuld hv workd out dat all red-blooded men gt attractd to beautiful women n churned dem out dat way in droves...so mayb dickens(shit!!...dat ws a mistake) theory is all chicken-shit n i'll tell u xctly hw i came to observe dis interesting piece of completely useless jaywalking dat i did n u shuld avoid...





so yea v hv dis collg fest in a coupla days n d balls hv strtd rolling(nw dat ws a stinky joke wsnt it??..;-) n guys being guys r looking everywhr meanin dey r hvin a field day...nw as i said i ws jaywalking(dats a term jay leno gave birth metaphorically...it means walking aimlessly n observing shit thngs people do n finding humour in dose idiotic things)...so dese 2 grls walk past by n wt dese 3 guys do r check dem out in d primitive way(i think its my subjugate duty to inform u dat in dis case primitive means- "not subtle";-)...n dese grls r so completely aloof as if dey r unaware of oder existing species on dis planet...d guys hv goggled n dey move to d next thing...nw i ws walking behind dem n dis is wat ws d rxn of d grls...i tried hard nt to eavesdrop bt sweet audible voice is always unfilterable...



grl 1(thru d side of hr mouth n almost bristling) : dose guys chckd me out??...luk at dem...deir guts...scoundrels...

grl 2(speakin in a funny way) : no dey ddnt...

grl 1(nw indignantly) : yes dey did...i saw dey did...

grl 2(luks at grl1 n archs hr eyebrows) : ok...

grl1(giggles suddenly n infuriatingly hard) : dey did ddnt dey??...

grl2(luks ahead n a twitch on d left side of her face, mayb smiling) : yea dey did...

grl1 cnt contain hr unappeasable excitement n breaks in2 a song hum in 10 seconds flat wid an almost unnoticeable spring in hr step....





i'm boggled so i stay back n try 2 think about d mechanics of d female mind...i cnt so i come n write dis blog....cn sum1 pls explain wt transpired to dis lost blogger??;-)...

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Jason Bourne...;-)





my frnds cant stand me wen i talk about Jason Bourne n here's d worst part, dey dont understand enough to dislike him...u c, i hv read d bourne, no make dat -"The Bourne Trilogy"...;-) some 12 times n i find d tormenting haunts of bourne's mind incredibly alluring...his is a journey in2 d violent n torturous maze of hell widout a past memory...a clean sheet where fragmented bits of writing are bolted by words, actions n intutions...a world where d imbalance of insanity n reason are lost in a time warp...n he lives on instinct...d fractionating deviation b/w life and death is eroded by animalistic primitivity, dat of a hunted animal's...




his hand-to-hand combat is cruelly superior to d best, a lightning fast array of moving hands n bludgeoning feet dat crash in shoulder blades n abdomen, surging granite hard slabs of palm dat cudgel into throat n hands dat break bones widout effort...insanity be thy name...his is a story of convoluted proportions, he wanted death n he ws born again, his past a blank, his bullet riddled body fished out of the Mediterranean Sea, a bank code surgically embedded in2 his hip...he has no name n he sets out to find his past, a past dat sends him reeling in2 d darkest realms of violence n blood-coated grime ever known...



robert ludlum, d author of d books(fr dose who r aliens on dis planet...;-)creates an effervescent character whose bleeding pain n torturous journey through d darkness imbibes heart-racing moments, violent n crimson colour action in n magnificient n enriching in detail adds pulse-pounding thrill to this psychological action suspense thriller n makes it a covetous read...Jason Bourne casts a spell dat is eternally infallible n takes u on a journey dat makes u hold ur breath as he alone pulses his way thru d dark labyrinthe of his past life, dodging bullets, automatic weapon wielding assassins n CIA itself where every1 wants him dead, a bullet hole smeared between his eyes...



who is Jason Bourne???...


the answer may kill him.



N now fr all d Bourne fans, heres my frst edited video...check it out n comment...heres d link...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvvKBduyQM8

pls do comment on hw it was...till den adios...cheers...;)

Saturday, March 14, 2009

reclusive teacher...



blogging(which in my case hs escalated) is smthng i pickd up frm a frnd...dis frnd of mine is a purist of undefined inclinations...his heart n soul rests in a way linear to how his sentences r arranged...his earliest criticism of my blogs ws dat "u dnt write english bt nonchalance"...bamboozled by dis bizzare point i askd fr elaboration...he grunted lyk a sore-ass yak of d highlands-"jst luk at d way u write will u??...its all tipsy, as if d words got drunk n starched out in d sun..."


now m no einstein bt it ws d second tym in as many minutes dat his words seemed to brutally escape my feeble senses...mentally i thot of going n takin an IQ test bt in d physical world i broke it down to him dat i ws asking d criticism to b elaborated n nt whether he ws doing freelance work fr oxford dictionary...he scrunched up his face airily n rotated his right wrist loosely lyk a nobel laureate about to denounce d theory of relativity...i waited patiently lyk d true scholar awaitin d thesis frm d horse's mouth dat vil shake d world...it came smthng lyk dis, his voice a cleat of a masterful prodigy-"u c, ur thoughts r in a spiralling horizon of acerbic emptiness which wen u bring out resembles d awesome stillness of an empty colosseum...d beats r remarkably loud bt d essence is missing...d essence of d true depth..."


his face ws so writ wid explanation dat i culdnt bear to tell him dat his denouncement of einstein's theory ws hogwash n d most creative bullshit ever...instead i told him dat i got d point(even though dere wsnt ne...;-)...he relaxed back in 2 his chair n dis tym grunted lyk a yeti of d himalyas n i finally got wat he ws tryin to tell me-"so u c u shuld write english lyk its properly written...capitals aftr a full stop, commas wen a pause, no acronym, no "dat" instead of "that"..."


i lukd at him...mayb i ws too incredulous to speak n d expression came out a bit too harsh bt dunno y he scarpered frm d spot...



Thursday, March 5, 2009

reverse dreaming...

The dreary existence of our forsaken selves r misplaced n mismatched to d hilt in dis inverted world...my friends of late hv bin bearing d brunt of wat dey say is my "cynical n sarcastic" best...my profs come to class n announce in a monodrone voice of a whooshing vaccuum cleaner-"ariiijiiiiiiiit(d i's r longer pertaining to my non-visibility in classes of late n d i's continue till some kind(perverted...) soul ends his/her search by declaring my burrow located deep in d corner of left hand side last bench...n as dey say- d buck stops dere...




jokes r cruelly tipped off by d haunting aura of nonsensical blabber dat keeps emanating from my mouth(n in dis case my fingers...)which in turn find solace in some distracted frnd's ears(m sure dat my words dnt inject nethng remotely gud oderwise some ppl wuld hv bin bound long ago)...noder thing m sure about is dat my "cynical" humdrumming dat my frnds hv brought to my recent & reticent notice fr d past days has in fact bin bred nt by my atrocious fate as i hv smtym said bt by my acceptin of situations...i smtyms feel lyk bttr prepared nowadays...case in example is wen i reach out fr my purse aftr having d disgusting bhelpuri n find to my close observation dat its empty...it has also come to my latest notice(courtesy my kind friend biswajeet) dat d sky isnt blue 'coz of science bt 'coz of sins...


cynical??...says who??...



my life was never d humour laden platinum spoon(which by d way i ws born wid....or was i??...newayz) dat i hv bin cradling(n drooling all over..) while trying vainly (or ws it valiantly??..) to gt straight (nt d metaphorical sense mind u...) in lyf...christ m confused ain't i??...n my profs say dat m getting worse..."worse dan who??" -i ask plaintively, my mind drawing a blank...i get a stare dat says- "very funny young man"...bt were it funny dey'll b laughing won't dey??...



n while i count stars at night somedays(sleep seems to b escaping me wen i need her d most) i cn c a face up dere...i blink my eyes...yea i ws hallcinatin i realize...bt den i frget d stars n try to c d face again...i strain...i push...hard...i cn make out...bt its faint...n den it vanishes...
u know d thing about hallucinating dnt u??...it's bare...



P.S-god bless u...


Sunday, March 1, 2009

word's worth...;-)

JAN 2nd 2009, 4.15 a.m, Tumkur...



It was a chilly, decrepit winter night, d cold waning as d night reluctantly released d clutches of darkness over dis part of d world. 3 guys lay prone on 3 diff. beds of a hostel. Insomnia was at it's peak, controlling us n we had run out of topics to discuss... & at 4.15 dat nyt we 3 geniuses decided to write smthng, precisely speaking- a poem. One gave up in minutes. Me n d oder soldiered on...



20 mins later, i had had enough of his sniggers n threw my half-written poem at d lazy bum who had given up, challenging him to complete my absurd train of thoughts dat hd(amazingly...;-) culminated in2 smthng remotely resembling a poem...he accepted n i proudly present....





The Last Spring

The world has fallen,

Angst of the sigh still unseen,

Beneath the darkened wing,

I still await the last spring...





Ripped is the pain, the tremors vacantly lean,

Away from it all, cries the child from his mother weaned,

Rusted is the love, the hope few n far between,

Lasting are the cries, d scars raw yet clean,

And yet the birds sing,

So here I am, awaiting the last fall of spring...



Beyond the undead scars that my heart adorns

Leagues from respite, hopes yet unborn,

Beneath the bloods of past I still drape,

For a sunshine the heart craves,

Against the darkness that the undertakers bring,

I hope n await the last spring...







thanku, thanku,thanku...

from me n biswajeet(yea dat's d idiot's name...)





n yea by d way, 5 hrs from d tym we wrote d poem, we wrote our physics semester exams...









As we say so majestically in d poem dat could give Shakespeare a run fr his money,



We're still awaiting d last spring....;-)







P.S- i'm ok...


P.S.S-n d flowers r for u...:-)